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Blame, Borderline Personality Disorder, Celebrities, Emotions, Pain, Shame, Substance Abuse, Suicide
Kurt Cobain and Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
After learning about BPD and reading a biography of Kurt Cobain, I suspect that, if he was not a borderline, he suffered from a similar disorder. So, here is a detailed analysis of the case for Kurt Cobain having Borderline Personality Disorder. [amazonshowcase_aae6001f3f5766bb5a55f3fb147c3088] Substance Abuse I don’t think I have to cite any references on this one. The bio I read makes it clear that Cobain was a junkie and used consistently. Also, despite his slim frame (5’7″, 130 pounds), he used far more heroin than others in his final days and his body was, for the most part, able to take it. He did overdose numerous times. Abuse of…
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Couple’s Counseling and BPD
Many times I’ve seen Non-BPs mention that couples counseling doesn’t really work for them. One member of an Internet support list I used to be a member of posted a message about his BP “snowing” the couple’s therapist. In fact, just about every message (of hundreds) was about this subject. Clearly, Non-BPs are upset about the dynamics of couple’s counseling and feel that they get “dumped on” by the BP. The Nons end of feeling blamed for everything. When this subject came up in the ATSTP group recently, I turned to a knowledgeable member about this subject. She posted the following message (which I’ve edited slightly because I wanted to…
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A Critical Analysis of the “3-C’s” of Being a Non-BP
Often I see in the support groups on the Internet (especially the “Welcome to Oz” or WTO groups), people providing the “3 C’s” of understanding your role as a Non-BP. I’ve seen it quoted on BPD support websites too. These “3 C’s” go as follows: I didn’t cause it I can’t control it I can’t cure it While these statements are generally true, I’d like to take some time to analyze these statements and add a fourth “C.” I’d also like to tell you what you CAN do – rather than what you didn’t or can’t do. These statements help take the onus off the Non-BP for any responsibility for…
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My best review of When Hope is Not Enough
In Oct 2007, I was at my wits end and ready to walk away from my raging husband after 4 months of marriage. He had been in therapy for over a year, yet still raging almost daily, beating himself half to death, lying to me about the most ridiculous stuff and destroying our home. All this chaos was causing my 2 teenagers to alienate me out of fear of him. As a Project Manager, I had participated in many classes and seminars on effective communication in the workplace through my job, but it seemed that nothing I tried worked with my husband… most of the time, it only seemed to…
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When Tools Become Triggers
Why boundaries and detaching can make things worse…. I decided to write this post because I have seen many non-BPs frustrated over the fact that when they try to use the tools in certain books with their BP, the tools seem to cause more rage and emotional dysregulation. The two “tools” that I have found that cause the most problems are boundaries and detachment. I’ve already written a LOT about boundaries and where my view of boundaries diverges with some of the other “Non-BP authors.” Today, I’d like to turn to detachment. “Stop Walking on Eggshells” recommends on page 98, that a Non-BP “detach with love” from a BP and…
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Biology, Blame, Borderline Personality Disorder, Emotions, Odds and Ends, Resources, Stats, Validation
Follow the Yellow Click Road
Apparently, someone over at Welcome to Oz (WTO) Internet list posted a message asking about me and what I am all about concerning BPD and Non-BPs. This lead to a huge spike in traffic with my average number of accesses basically doubling over the weekend. I’m still a member of WTO, so I decided to login and take a look at what people are saying about me over there. I haven’t posted in years and haven’t logged in in months. Obviously, there are many, many new people who have no idea who I am or what I’m about. There are a few members still hanging around who do remember me.…