About Anything to Stop the Pain

This site is for partners and parents of people with Borderline Personality Disorder (collectively, the nons). This is not a BP-bashing site. If you want to bash the person with BPD, go to another site – there are plenty of those on the Internet.

Instead, I try to present different view of BPD and discuss skills and strategies to help make life more peaceful for nons and BPs alike.

If you are a loved one – a parent, partner, child or friend – of a person with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) – diagnosed or suspected – Anything to Stop the Pain can make your life easier. Life with someone with BPD is possible if you know what to do and how to do it. 

About Bon Dobbs

I am NOT a doctor or mental health professional. Each of the posts in this blog are based on my personal experiences and research about Borderline Personality Disorder. Please do not take any advice provided as professional or medical advice. If you have BPD or are in a relationship with someone with BPD, I encourage you to seek professional mental health help.

What I am (rather than what I’m not) is a loved one of someone with BPD. My wife has been diagnosed with the disorder and one of my daughters exhibits traits of the disorder. I have been trained in Dialectical Behavior Therapy family Skills Training (DBT-FST) and in mentalization techniques. I have attended professional conferences regarding BPD. It was necessary for me to participate fully in my daughter’s therapy, since she is a minor.

I have learned, practiced and honed my skills as a supporter of people with BPD. Whether I can be considered an “authority” on the interpersonal struggles of a loved one of someone with BPD is arguable. Still, my previous books, Internet support list and blog have helped hundreds of people live a more peaceful and loving life with their BPD loved ones.

My experience with BPD:

I have a wife of almost 25 years with the disorder.

I have a daughter (one of several children) with BPD traits, although she is too young to be diagnosed with the disorder.

I have spent the past 10 years researching the disorder and exchanging advice, skills training and personal experiences about this disorder with others, both in person and on-line.

I have written (thus far) 3 books about the disorder.

I have been blogging about the disorder for more than 10 years.

I am the owner and operator of the (quite amazing, IMO) ATSTP Internet Support List and have been for the past 9 years. I have learned SO much from the members of this group. I consider them close friends.

And no, I do not have the disorder myself.

I have been trained in DBT family skills, and I am training in mentalization-based techniques.