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Shame and Invalidation
Here’s a good site about invalidation: http://eqi.org/invalid.htm A quote: “Invalidation is to reject, ignore, mock, tease, judge, or diminish someone’s feelings. Constant invalidation may be one of the most significant reasons a person with high innate emotional intelligence suffers from unmet emotional needs later in life.(1) A sensitive child who is repeatedly invalidated becomes confused and begins to distrust his own emotions. He fails to develop confidence in and healthy use of his emotional brain– one of nature’s most basic survival tools. To adapt to this unhealthy and dysfunctional environment, the working relationship between his thoughts and feelings becomes twisted. His emotional responses, emotional management, and emotional development will likely…
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Runaway Shame?
I made another realization recently. When I am depressed, I don’t know what makes me sad, but I feel sad (it’s worse than “sad” but that’s the general family). I imagine that when people get panic disorder they fear fear for “no reason”. So, I was thinking – perhaps depression is when sadness goes haywire, panic when fear goes haywire and BPD (or ERD, or whatever the disorder is called) is when shame goes haywire. It’s not like there is a “valid external reason” to feel shame. They just DO. But often they look for external reasons. It’s a theory anyway… No related posts.
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Versions of Shame
Versions of Shame Version A) they are just born that way. THEY are not even sure of what they are ashamed of. They carry around three core beliefs: “The world is dangerous and malevolent”, “I am powerless and vulnerable” and “I am inherently unacceptable.” But they don’t know WHY – they have just always been that way. The only reason that I can gather is that they have labile emotions and they lead to an unstable sense of self. That instability is what they are ashamed of (and scared anyone and everyone will know). It’s like a nightmare in which you’ve pissed your pants and you hope to god no…
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Role of Shame in BPD
A very good article about the role of shame in BPD. I have said many times how shame plays a central role in BPD. Frankly, I feel that shame feelings are biological in BPD. In the article he says abuse is the cause, but I feel that shame in BPD is like sadness in clinical depression – it just exists even if there is no cause. Maybe there are two types of BPD, one that is biological and one that is caused by abuse? Or maybe the one that is caused by abuse is PTSD and not BPD? Anyway, here is an excerpt: Dr. Donald Nathanson has pioneered the study…
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Toxic Shame
An article about the many manifestations of shame. …study of James Masterson’s work on borderline personalities, as well as my experience with watching his working films, convinces me that there is minimal difference in the treatment of some toxically shame-based people and his treatment of the Borderline Personality. Don’t see shame in your borderline? Look more carefully.http://www.soulselfhelp.on.ca/tshame.html No related posts.
