Recently, Randi Kreger published her new book “The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder.” I read it and have to give thanks to Randi for providing it to me gratis. Thanks Randi!
At the same time, I have a problem with this book. While it is MUCH better than “Stop Walking on Eggshells” (SWOE), her previous book about NON-BPs, I agree with her prescription about 40%. Her sections on “Communicating to be heard” and “Reinforcing right behavior” are agreeable, the rest is NOT agreeable to me. I will soon offer a true book review of this new book; however, I believe (humbly) that my book WHINE is a MUCH better book for understanding and dealing with a person with BPD than either SWOE or “The Essential Guide…” by Randi. While I know where she is coming from, she misses an essential thing about BPD – that thing is IAAHF (“it’s all about his/her feelings”), a concept in WHINE. She still seems to think that you can make it (at first) about YOUR feelings, which, with BPD, is impossible at first. This is both my opinion and the opinions of the members of my group. I am a bit miffed that SWOE sold something like 300,00 copies and WHINE 300, because I think (as do my almost 400) group members that WHINE is a MUCH better book to understand the BPD/NON-BPD dynamic than either SWOE or “The Essential Family Guide…”
I know that Randi will see this via her Google alerts and I welcome her comments. I have no argument or disagreement with Randi. I respect her and feel she is contributing to the community the best she can. At that same time, I feel her publishing efforts fall short of what is effective in the NON-BP area.