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Tough Love is not an effective approach to BPD
Tough Love is not an effective approach with children and teenagers with Borderline Personality Disorder. Although some therapists and self-help authors recommend tough love as what should be done with BPD, it is ultimately detrimental to the borderline and to your relationship with the borderline. The problem comes in regarding the nature of the disorder. While behavioral therapies can work, those based on reinforcement and shaping, those therapies usually include acceptance strategies and non-judgmental approaches. The nature of BPD is that the individual with the disorder is in deep emotional pain because of the dysregulation of the emotional system. They are exquisitely sensitive to emotional experiences and many of these…
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Tough Love Reconsidered with BPD
Does one use tough love with BPD? You can’t START with tough love, because first emotional trust has to be established.
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Why “Stop Walking on Eggshells” is a Recipe for Divorce
Many people when they find out about BPD, read “Stop Walking on Eggshells”. Just about everyone in the “non” community has read it. I read it AND read the workbook. At the time I thought, “Yes! Someone who understands!” I thought, “Finally, a method for dealing with my wife’s crazy behaviors.” Well, folks, I was wrong. This book is about nons and ways for the nons to handle the BP’s behavior. Unfortunately, for the BPs, it does nothing to help them heal. In fact, the idea of setting limits and boundaries for BPs only serves to piss them off more. Let me tell you why: BPD is a disorder in…