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BPD, Self-Regulation and Others
Ok, after posting about book sales recently and stuff like that, now it’s time for a much more substantive post about BPD. Today, I plan to talk about self-regulation and a new study that points out an intriguing aspect of BPD. There has been much talk in the BPD research and clinical community about the “core” of BPD. Once it was thought to be a personality disorder or even an extreme form of PTSD. Dr. Marsha Linehan (the inventor of DBT) talks about dysregulation in a number of systems, the most important of which (in my interpretation) is the emotional regulation system. People with BPD are extremely emotionally sensitive and…
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Validation Article from DBT’s perspective
Here is an interesting article on emotional validation for parents of people with BPD… from a new blog about understanding DBT. Dialectical Behavior Therapy Validation Strategies for Parents By Christy Matta, MA How Do We Validate Validation and active listening techniques are specific ways of approaching your child to increase cooperation and balance the change we are often asking for from our children. 1. Responsiveness: Addressing our children with interest in what they are saying, doing and understanding. Expressing concern about his or her wishes and needs. 2. Warm engagement: Approaching kids with warmth and friendliness. Active positive communication with our voice, tone and posture. 3. Self-Disclosure: Communicating our own…
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Just in time for the holidays
Hey all, I haven’t posted much in the way of skills lately, but today, as the holidays are upon us, I think it is helpful to go over some emotional skills and other tools that can help us non-BPD people get through the holidays reasonably unscathed. The holidays are a tough emotional time for everyone. There are expectations that the holidays be “jolly and happy” when, sometimes, the holidays are anything but. The get-together with relatives – many who don’t understand the actions, feelings and behaviors of someone with BPD – can cause huge stress for those with BPD and for the loved ones. Expectations of a low conflict Christmas…
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On My Side
I often hear people with BPD/ERD say that they feel that their loved ones are “not on my side” or that the loved ones are “supposed to be on my side.” This phrase stuck out at me when I read the story about the suicide of Megan Meier (the “MySpace suicide” case), because, although I have no insight into Megan’s mental health, clearly when she was insulted and rejected on MySpace, and she was emotionally dysregulated. She came to her mother, and after her mother admonished her for the use of foul language on MySpace, Megan cried and said, “You’re my mom. You’re supposed to be on my side!” (This…
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Primary and Secondary Emotions
Last week, I was reading a portion of Dr. Marsha Linehan’s book “Cognitive Behavior Treatment Of Borderline Personality Disorder” and stumbled upon a reference that I had never noticed before. It reads: Emotional validation strategies contrast with approaches that focus on the overreactivity of emotions or the distorted basis of their generation. Thus, they are more like the approach of Greenberg and Safran (1987), who make a distinction between primary or “authentic” emotions and secondary of “learned” emotions. The latter are reactions to primary cognitive appraisals and emotional responses; they are the end products of chains of feelings and thoughts. Dysfunctional and maladaptive emotions, according to Greenberg and Safran, are…
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WHINE and DBT Skills Compared
Occasionally, a discussion on my private email list that I feel it would be helpful to share here. I only do it if the discussion is not personal in nature. This discussion is about proper application of the skills in WHINE and how they compare to DBT skills. My list member’s question/comments are indented… my responses are not. Now I have some time to answer these questions and the ones you ask in a later post. Let me start with these. Thanks again Bon. Now I am re-examining how best to communicate. I have a bunch of things I have been thinking about WHINE that I wanted to ask you…