Press is reporting Heather Locklear checked into a mental facility for an eval. Wonder if they’ll disclose the diagnosis?

Admitted for depression

Vicki Salemi

Heather Locklear has checked herself into an in-patient treatment facility in Arizona. The quintessential evening soap opera vixen is on the road to recovery. And no, it’s not for substance abuse.

As for the reason? To deal with issues of anxiety, depression, and to re-evaluate her current condition. We give props to the 46 year-old actress who apparently recently switched doctors and is taking a pro-active stance towards her mental health. The new doc recommended that her condition and medication be re-evaluated.

While her publicist confirmed that Heather’s been dealing with anxiety and depression, it seems she’s taking it head on: by entering the facility she’ll get a proper diagnosis and treatment.

Actually, a few months ago paramedics were called to her home. Her psychiatrist called 9-1-1 and told authorities there was concern for a possible overdose attempt on prescription meds. Well, paramedics left her home extremely quickly after arrival and deemed everything was all right.

As for the back story, last year her ex-husband and Bon Jovi band member Richie Sambora stayed in a treatment facility last year. Their ten year-old daughter Ava is staying with family at the moment.

Best wishes, Heather!

Bon Dobbs :: Jun.26.2008 :: Celebrities, Suicide :: 2 Comments »

From USA Today…

Mentally ill face extra-long ER waits

By Julie Appleby, USA TODAY

Psychiatric patients who need hospitalization wait for hours in emergency departments for admission because hospitals are dropping mental health units and beds are scarce, a new survey says.

Nearly 80% of hospitals said mentally ill patients sometimes wait four hours or more to be admitted, says the American College of Emergency Physicians, which surveyed 328 emergency medical directors. About 10% said patients wait more than a day on average.

Average admission times for non-psychiatric patients were shorter: Only 30% of directors said those patients waited four hours or more. Yet 84% of the medical directors said ER wait times for all patients would drop if their hospitals had better psychiatric services.

Only half of the hospitals surveyed had psychiatric units. The rest transferred patients, sometimes far from homes and families. Hospitals are closing their units because of inadequate payments from government and insurers, unpaid costs for the uninsured and too few psychiatrists willing to work in hospitals, says James Bentley of the American Hospital Association.

Patients with mental illness “are the ones we hold the longest because there are so few psychiatric services available, and the ones that are available are overwhelmed,” says David Mendelson, of the physicians group.

The long waits can be troublesome for mentally ill patients, says Bruce Schwartz, director of psychiatry at Montefiore Medical Center in the Bronx, N.Y. “For individuals in need of admission because they’re psychotic or severely depressed, it can be a very uncomfortable, scary, disorienting time.”

The survey found 61% of hospitals do not have psychiatry staff caring for ER patients while they wait, although they receive treatment for other medical problems.

The poll comes amid growing concern about wait times and overcrowding in the nation’s ERs, which experienced a 14% jump in visits for all illnesses and injuries from 2001 to 2005.

Since 2000, the number of psychiatric beds in U.S. community hospitals dropped 12%, the association’s statistics show. The number of hospital beds overall fell 4%.

In March, the closure of Santa Rosa Memorial Hospital’s psychiatric unit left California’s Sonoma County without hospital-based care for mentally ill patients. Now patients must be taken 40 miles or more away to other hospitals.

“It’s not unheard of for people to spend a night or even a couple of nights (in the ER),” says Sonoma County Mental Health Services Director Art Ewart.

Bon Dobbs :: Jun.23.2008 :: Treatment, Borderline Personality Disorder :: 1 Comment »

So, it turns out that smoking crack is bad for you…

Cocaine ‘damaged Winehouse’s lungs’

Amy Winehouse could struggle to catch her breath and hit high notes as a result of suffering emphysema, a lung expert has said.

The singer’s father spoke out at the weekend about his worries that Winehouse could lose her life unless she kicks her drug habit.

In an interview with the Sunday Mirror, Mitch Winehouse said his daughter - who was rushed to hospital recently after collapsing - had developed the chronic lung disease emphysema, possibly brought on by smoking crack cocaine.

Bon Dobbs :: Jun.23.2008 :: Celebrities, Substance Abuse :: No Comments »

Well, well, well… I don’t know why but apparently I continue to be a subject at WTO. Weird. I posted about this a few days ago. I’ve been out of touch with the blog for a few days, while I do family stuff and take care of my email list. I really admire the people on my list; they do a great job of being both honest and validating with one another - while at the same time providing constructive advice to one another.

Boundaries… I’ve posted about boundaries many times before. I think boundaries are one of the most misunderstood concepts in the non-BP/BP relationship. While it is difficult to be a parent of anyone (much less someone with BPD) and provide no guidance to your child - I mean, it is natural to want to provide some advice and guidance to children - boundaries in the sense that many people on the Internet understand them are not effective in an emotional situation. Now, WAIT! Actually boundaries ARE effective… OK, how can I say they aren’t effective and are effective at the same time?

The major problem with boundaries is that most of the Nons out there believe that boundaries are something to “control” or “moderate” their BP’s behavior. This concept is absolutely ineffective and untrue. Boundaries created for other people (whether they have BPD or not) are not effective - especially when the other person has a general fear of judgment like those with BPD. Those types of boundaries are not really boundaries at all - they are RULES for the behavior of another person. They will not work in emotional situations.

Boundaries that DO work are those you set for yourself with respect to other people’s behavior. In other words, boundaries that guide your OWN behavior are effective ones. If you say to someone, “I will not go to a resuarant with you if you are drunk” (for example), what you are really doing is setting a boundary that limits/affects your OWN behavior given certain conditions. That type of boundary is effective because you, as a non-BP, have complete control over it. You can choose NOT to do something given a set of conditions.

I would encourage you to examine what you ”boundaries” you have in place and see if they are rules for other people’s behaviors or if they are actual personal boundaries that manage your own behavior and reactions. If they are the former, I expect you will end up being frustrated quickly. If they are the later, then you can find some peace when they are applied to a given situation. This statement isn’t meant to imply that someone with BPD will automatically accept your application of personal boundaries (to yourself). No, they might rage at you or try and convince you to do otherwise (i.e. go to the restaurant even if they are drunk), but you are the master of your own behavior and you can always be firm and say, “No.”

Bon Dobbs :: Jun.21.2008 :: Resources, Boundaries, Borderline Personality Disorder :: 11 Comments »

Well, I’ve looked over recent keywords that find my blog and found these to be interesting (with my comment in parenthesis):

• borderline tough love (it doesn’t work see this post)
• bpd not wrong (I wonder a BP saying they’re not wrong or a non-bp complaining about it?)
• bpd impacts on loved ones (big ones! That’s the whole point of the site huh?)
• how to stop ruminating (It isn’t easy. Mindfulness helps.)
• dumped out of the blue bpd (yeah, it happens)
• how to stop a demonic possession (I’m amazed at the number of demonic possession believers out there)
• here is the last two digits of my social (ok, where is the rest? - haha)
• bpd inability to love (sad…)
• bpd look of hate evil (I’ve seen it.)
• outlandish lies (poor guy/gal)
• best site anythingtostopthepain (my favorite of the group)
• cocaine and bpd (not a good combo)
• bpd wife bitch (bitter much?)
• shall i contact my ex who has bpd (not if you don’t have to)
• how do i validate my borderline daughter (nice… I’m glad you’re trying!)
• “borderline personality” evil (evil again)
• drunk housewives (is this someone looking for porn? or support? Maybe a new ABC show?)
• bpd are evil (evil again!)
• how do you stop a demonic possession (you can’t - it doesn’t exist. I guess you can stop believing in it.)

Bon Dobbs :: Jun.16.2008 :: Stats, Odds and Ends, Borderline Personality Disorder :: 3 Comments »

Apparently, someone over at Welcome to Oz (WTO) Internet list posted a message asking about me and what I am all about concerning BPD and Non-BPs. This lead to a huge spike in traffic with my average number of accesses basically doubling over the weekend. I’m still a member of WTO, so I decided to login and take a look at what people are saying about me over there. I haven’t posted in years and haven’t logged in in months.

Obviously, there are many, many new people who have no idea who I am or what I’m about. There are a few members still hanging around who do remember me. There are a couple of people who seem to have a pretty dim view of what I have to offer - although I think that those people don’t know me very well and have interacted with me only cursorily. First, today, I’d like to outline my philosophy about BPD and Non-BPs to clear up some of the mis-statements and mis-perceptions.

• I do believe that BPD is a serious mental illness and not a case of a “behavioral disorder.” In other words, BPD is not merely a case of someone just behaving badly. I further believe that much of the core issue with someone with BPD is emotional and based on poor emotional regulation skills. The reaction to strong negative emotions (and other factors, like  shame and impulsiveness) cause the “poor behavior.” I put that in quotes because the behavior has a function and the function IMO is to make the BP feel better. A person (whether they have BP or not) CAN learn to behave differently in the face of strong negative emotions. It takes practice and requires the acquisition of emotional skills. However, I also believe that the emotional under-pinnings are not going to disappear, just because the person with BPD learns to behave more effectively. Emotionally, they are just more sensitive than other people - that is the way they are. In other words, I don’t believe that I have a “cure” for BPD, which was bandied about at WTO.
• I also believe that the only person that you can change in a relationship is yourself. It is my opinion that once you change your own approach to emotional situations, the person with whom you are having the relationship will react to the change in various ways. Sometimes they will have a fit. Sometimes they will appreciate the “new you.” And sometimes a complex combination of emotions will arise. My “methods” are a combination of emotional understanding (of your own emotions and of theirs), emotional validation (which is complex in itself), positive reinforcement and “inserting your (the Non’s) feelings” into the conversation. There are some other skills and sub-skills, but that’s a quick synopsis. IMO this complex combination of skills (which also require practice) will improve the relationship and make sure that you don’t “walk on eggshells” around the other person. Boundaries can help - however, boundaries are a subject unto themselves, and I find that most people don’t know what boundaries are and how to apply them properly.
• There was some argument at WTO that my motives were suspect, because I am trying to make some money on what I have learned and practiced thus far. I think the operative word here is trying, because I don’t really make enough money to even operate this website at a break-even level. No, I’ve not made much money at all as a “professional Non-BP” (if that’s what I am). What I have been able to do is have an impact on the lives of many people. That is pretty satisfying in itself, and I will not pretend that I wouldn’t like to do it full-time. I certainly enjoy interacting with others in my situation and exchanging advice, strategies, knowledge, etc. more than my “day-job.” But it will be a long time (and probably never) before I will be able to do that. Besides, most of my support activity and knowledge-sharing I do for free - either here on in my Google Group. There’s no charge for participating in that group or to read these posts. At this point, any money I do make just contributes to the cost of operating this website.
• I don’t think that BPs have to be “let off the hook” and that they have no responsibility when it comes to a relationship. I also don’t think that you, as a Non-BP, have to forgo your feelings to live alongside a person with BPD. Both of those ideas were suggested at WTO. Neither is true. I think everyone in a relationship will have emotions, reactions, expectations, etc. Everyone is allowed to have each of these. Everyone has certain responsibilities in a relationship as well. What I DO advocate is looking at the function behind behavior and understanding the dynamic that exists. Many times I’ve seen people suggest that my methods give the BP “undo advantage” in a relationship. Huh? I thought this was a “loved one?” I don’t think that “love is a battlefield.” It’s not us-agains- them. That is just more black-and-white thinking on the part of the Non. If you’re going through a bloody divorce with someone with BPD, I can certainly understand where this might come into play, but, as I have said, my methods are about “living with and loving” someone with BPD. There is responsibility on both sides of the fence. It takes a certain environment IMO to make sure that responsibility is acknowledged - and that environment has to be one that is validating, otherwise you’re going to be caught in a shame hurricane. Nothing will get accomplished.
• Finally, I believe that effective emotional skills are helpful for anyone in any relationship. Anger, sadness, spite, resentment, blame, etc., etc. lead to a corrosive environment within any relationship. My “methods” attempt to reverse some of the corrosiveness and build stronger, healthier emotional relationships. You may not agree with my methods, which is fine. Personally, I’ve had to try everything to find anything that worked.

I guess it’s better to be talked about a little, whether it is positive or negative, than to be ignored. Thanks to a group member of mine who notified me of the discussion and who defended me (you know who you are).

Bon Dobbs :: Jun.16.2008 :: Resources, Odds and Ends, Stats, Blame, Biology, Validation, Emotions, Borderline Personality Disorder :: 1 Comment »

My technorati authority took a huge hit this week when 20 bloggers passed the 6 month link limit. I had a bunch of bloggers on live journal link to my article on BPD and Lying. I’ve written several more posts on lying - it seems to be a pretty hot topic with BPD.

But 6 months has past and BOOM! The authority went from 29 to 9. Ouch…. oh, well. More good content to come - so maybe it’ll go back up!

Bon Dobbs :: Jun.14.2008 :: Stats, Odds and Ends, Lying, Borderline Personality Disorder :: 1 Comment »

Hi all,

Today I approved my book for distribution. It’s not perfect - it has a couple of typos and word problems, but it’s pretty good for a first edition. I hope to see it on Amazon (and other Internet sites) shortly. When it appears, I’ll let you all know. Right know it is available for download and print from Lulu.

You may notice on my website I have NOT recommended “Stop Walking on Eggshells.” Why? Well, I have several problems with that book. First, the co-writer basically stumbled into the “non-bp” biz. She doesn’t live with a BP. She has now started to write an “essential guide” for families for dealing with a BP. What experience does she have except running her vitriolic email list?

I’ve been living with a BP for 15+ years. Jeez, it’s amazing what passes as experience these days.

Bon Dobbs :: Jun.13.2008 :: Resources, Borderline Personality Disorder :: No Comments »

I stumbled across this children’s book, An Umbrella for Alex, which is a book for kids trying to understand mom’s BPD behavior. Like I said, I haven’t bought it or read it. Maybe one of you would like to and drop me a message as to how effective it is (or is not). I know my kids know when (as my daughter puts it) “mommy’s doing it” - which I know she means that mom is acting an an impulsive BPD-like fashion.

I’m a little wary of the book though. It comes from the Personality Disorder Awareness Network (PDAN) of which I have never heard. It would seem that in my travels around the BP-world that I would have come into contact with them in some shape or form. The other thing that puzzles me is that on their resources page they have several links about divorcing and leaving a person with BPD. I know this is a reality to many Non-BPs, I’m just not sure what the attitude of the above book is in that respect.

One positive thing is this statement on their “About PDAN” page:

Our mission is to encourage, sponsor, and financially support projects related to assisting those in relationships with individuals with BPD. We encourage an atmosphere of respect and compassion for those suffering with the illness, while acknowledging the emotional distress and impairment in everyday functioning of those individuals in relationships with someone with BPD.

I would agree with that, I suppose.

Bon Dobbs :: Jun.10.2008 :: Resources, Borderline Personality Disorder :: 1 Comment »

Here is a study conducted by the University of Iowa and developer of STEPPS. The STEPPS program stands for:

Systems Training for Emotional Predictability and Problem Solving (STEPPS) for outpatients with borderline personality disorder: a randomized controlled trial and 1-year follow-up.

Blum N, St John D, Pfohl B, Stuart S, McCormick B, Allen J, Arndt S, Black DW.

Department of Psychiatry, University of Iowa Carver College of Medicine, Iowa City, IA 52242, USA.

OBJECTIVE: Systems Training for Emotional Predictability and Problem Solving (STEPPS) is a 20-week manual-based group treatment program for outpatients with borderline personality disorder that combines cognitive behavioral elements and skills training with a systems component. The authors compared STEPPS plus treatment as usual with treatment as usual alone in a randomized controlled trial. METHOD: Subjects with borderline personality disorder were randomly assigned to STEPPS plus treatment as usual or treatment as usual alone. Total score on the Zanarini Rating Scale for Borderline Personality Disorder was the primary outcome measure. Secondary outcomes included measures of global functioning, depression, impulsivity, and social functioning; suicide attempts and self-harm acts; and crisis utilization. Subjects were followed 1 year posttreatment. A linear mixed-effects model was used in the analysis. RESULTS: Data pertaining to 124 subjects (STEPPS plus treatment as usual [N=65]; treatment as usual alone [N=59]) were analyzed. Subjects assigned to STEPPS plus treatment as usual experienced greater improvement in the Zanarini Rating Scale for Borderline Personality Disorder total score and subscales assessing affective, cognitive, interpersonal, and impulsive domains. STEPPS plus treatment as usual also led to greater improvements in impulsivity, negative affectivity, mood, and global functioning. These differences yielded moderate to large effect sizes. There were no differences between groups for suicide attempts, self-harm acts, or hospitalizations. Most gains attributed to STEPPS were maintained during follow-up. Fewer STEPPS plus treatment as usual subjects had emergency department visits during treatment and follow-up. The discontinuation rate was high in both groups. CONCLUSIONS: STEPPS, an adjunctive group treatment, can deliver clinically meaningful improvements in borderline personality disorder-related symptoms and behaviors, enhance global functioning, and relieve depression.

Bon Dobbs :: Jun.10.2008 :: Treatment, Borderline Personality Disorder :: No Comments »